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History's Visionaries |
It is all a matter of perception
And sometimes we meet history eye-to-eye
Yet other times we meet his story and
You believe in mistakes, don’t you?
I’ve been known to make a few
A time or two and
There is one that stalks me
Lives in my fairy-tale dreams
Threatening to expose the side of me
That came to be one night, see
I decided to take a little risk
Be the gurl I’ve never been
Until then and understand that there was
Kissing and touching
And I ain’t no prude so I was cool with him
going downtown
He said he was hungry
I let the man eat
The food was exquisite like my beauty, he said
We had nighttime conversation
His blunt tongue made the situation hot and me a
little sticky but
I knew what I was willing to do before we met up
that night
But my inability to say “No, that ain’t
going down”
In a polite and sexy, non-threatening
“maybe another night” tone had escaped me
In the midst of being physically
stimulated in the highest degree
Had me he, I was tongue-tied
Even a little petrified cause I could see
What would come of me
A dead-end road
This no-win situation
Had me attempting meditation in the backseat
with a lyin’ cheat
I’m always looking for my true visionary
He was temporary
Like bungalows on way too many
high school campus’
We made rhythm
And if it would have been with my true visionary
I would not have been having
Nightmarish
Telepathic
Communication
With every sista in history
who’s been stuck between
His four doors,
Hard dick, and her sanity
The decision had been made
His of course and
I felt like some traditional Mexican woman
Only I’m black in this life, so
That Machismo shit ain’t cool with me
He
Decided my fate
Fuck datin’ it
He was takin’ it
NOW
And I swear to God--most nights I wake up mid-
fairy-tale dream
Threatened by a “No”
not loud enough to instill fear in him
I sat in my car
Crying for what seemed like hours
Not knowing what would come of this
Or if I would be able to understand
The twisted confusion of what seemed like
Date Rape
I found myself understanding those gurls unable
o let their walls down
I built one miles high
Regretfully not fighting his lustful hands
Then
He must have been dyslexic
Cause when he saw the word “NO”
spill from my
quivering lips
His brain transformed it into “ON AND CRACKIN”
He made a fragmented sentence out of one word so
Maybe he is a visionary just not one in truth
He mentally envisioned me thrilled,
Moaning “YES”
He planned this passing in the night since he
first caught sight of me
This is a game for him
And others unlike me
Are gladly willing to accept his dirty dick, fake
shit 'cause he’s a notorious freak
But he knew I was different
I don’t let shit go when you playin’ with my life
I got too much to do and ain’t enough souls heard
Present day though
You can find me
Silly Putty pen in hand
Pad on bed
Phone at ear
True visionary on the other end
He’s rebuilding the lady in me with
Jill Scott CDs
Soothing bubble baths
Marvin Gaye records
Smiles that take my breath away
And his positivity
His positivity will conquer the world
In effect he’ll have his revolution
He tells me of his ancestry and his legacy
I have no choice but be captivated by a man so
incredible
He’s beautiful
And if you know him
Be thankful
I am thankful to finally know a man in truth
This man
Man is truth
This man is truth
And sometimes WE connect
with sistas in history
In the midst of
His four doors
His hard dick and my sanity
Our eyes meet her history
His story and
Her story
Our stories--which will not repeat
Cause I never have to repeat myself
My “NO” is always enough
copyright 2004
Miss Natalie
Patterson |
