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Flash In The Pawn |
It was a cold, wintry morning in the town of Hapsburg… the doves had settled in the overhang outside his shop, making their nests, laying their eggs, now cooing at sighting the first rays of the day's sun.
Hans Bruner inherited the shop from his father, who inherited from his… and so it went… many long years… comparable in age to most of the items stored in the dark recesses of the structure.
Hans was extra tired this time of the year… shoppers were less frequent, just the occasional American or Eastern European tourist, looking to find something "Deutsch" to bring back home for a relative.
He had just poured himself a hot cup of coffee, sat down on his favorite armchair, when he observed a strange-looking gentleman standing on the other side of the counter, smiling broadly in his direction. Hans missed his lip, allowing a dribble or two to land in his lap. He wiped away the moist droplets with his hand, then returned his attention to the man still wearing that incessant grin…
"Eh, hello? Can I help you with something?"
The man held out his hand to shake the shop owner's…
"My name is Shaman Sahara! Indeed, you may! I've traveled across all continents, been in every city and every village, looking for just one thing… well, to be more accurate… three."
Hans pulled free from the man's powerful grip, and looked up and down at this remarkable individual… his skin was delicately browned by the sun, he had a long mustache that had been twisted at the ends so that they would stand erect, mimicking the prominent smile he bore… his hat and clothing looked Arabic, consisting in large, of grandiose amounts of luscious satins… ocean blues, eggplant purples, blood reds… he most surely appeared a Sheik of some far-off land, Hans fathomed!
"What is it that you seek?… These three things that you speak of?"
The man scanned the despairing contents of the shop, then returned to facing the shopkeeper, who by then had arisen from the comfort of his chair, and set down his steaming beverage on top of the glass-covered counter before him.
The man squinted his eyes together, gently brushing his index finger at the tip of his mustache…
"You see, my fine merchant… what I seek, can not be found within the wares of this shop, or any other, for that matter!"
Hans raised his brows…
"Bu… but… I don't understand."
The man stood quite erect, and from his vantage point of greater height then the diminutive Hans, he resumed his speech…
"What I am searching for… what I have crossed the known world to acquire, is…"
He was swinging his arms as he spoke, but then paused and gazed directly into Herr Bruner's spectacled eyes…
"…is… three wishes."
Hans swallowed hard, but continued to stare into those charcoal-black piercing orbs.
The man stepped away from the counter a foot or two, then swung around, making his caped apparel flap up and return to his side… it reminded Hans of an old movie with Rudolph Valentino as its star… but this man didn't seem to be acting out a play… he was bent on getting what he came for…
…but three wishes?… what could that include, if he hadn't seen anything to his liking within the shop?… a shop he and his ancestors hadn't done well with, let alone create the ability for a foreigner of such magnitude to receive what he wished… three times more than Hans had the ability to produce!
Hans finally found the courage to speak up…
"Dear sir… I am but a humble man of little means. What you see in my shop has been carried over for many generations. To be quite candid… I just use this place to have some peace and quiet, away from my wife. I have no aspirations to make any sum of money with the items I display here, nor do I care to spend a nominal amount of time with anyone, but by myself."
"I found a small, quiet place in this erratic and violent world, where I can enjoy simple solitude, for many hours, and this suits me fine. Don't get me wrong! I don't mind helping others acquire what they are searching for, granted that I can find it in the resources I possess…"
"…but these three wishes… what do they entail? Like I said, I have humble means, but I can try to fulfill your need if I knew what it is you are seeking."
Sahara returned to smiling as he had when first seen by the shopkeeper…
"Really? You would do this? For a complete stranger?… Is it the suit? I picked it myself!"
Hans felt a little more at ease… the Sheik seemed a pleasant fellow, and jovial by his witty response.
"Would you care for a hot cup of coffee? Perhaps a slice of pie? It was baked fresh just this morning by the woman I addressed, as the wife I didn't wish to see the rest of my day!"
He laughed out loud at Bruner's remark…
"I do believe you and I will become great friends, my dear shopkeeper! I, Shaman Sahara, do will it so!"
Hans pointed to an additional chair that sat to the right of the one he'd been sitting in, and the visitor sat down with the addition of his Continental breakfast.
Sahara, with a cheekful of pie, faced Hans, and once again asked…
"So! About those three wishes… are you ready to grant me my first?"
Bruner was starting to get the man… there must be some form of parable to what he would ask… Hans needed to listen very carefully to glean their true meaning…
"Yes, my new friend! I do believe I am prepared for what ever you need, for that first of three wishes!"
Sahara gulped down what remained of his coffee, clearing his palette…
"Then… here it is… I wish…"
He paused, returning to his smiling self… it made Hans duplicate the sentiment; he to, grinned…
Sahara adjusted in his seat, sitting up straight…
"I wish… I wish I could… have your wife, as my own!" Hans gasped… then laughed out loud…
"My wife?! What on earth for?! I guess you haven't seen her! A fine young-looking gent as yourself? Well, by all means! Yes! I will grant you your wish, however insane it may appear to me… and all others on the planet! Is this a joke?! Really?! Mine would be giving her away! Damn, this is fun!"
Sahara clapped his hands together…
"Oh, my friend! You do not know what joy you have just given me! A bride of my very own! I am more than ecstatic with your granting my wish! A beautiful, loving woman for my very own!"
Hans squinted… is this guy for real? He wants Brunhilda Alisa Bruner? For a wife?! She can bake, but that's about all he will get from that poorest of peasant Frau. Hans kept listening. This was enjoyable! He couldn't wait to hear the next absurd request from the distinguished stranger…
"Are you ready for my second wish, dear sir?"
Hans released a snicker…
"Just as long as it isn't my cow, Wilma! Please go on!"
Sahara reached once again for the tip of his mustache, stroking it while appearing to give great thought to his next request…
"My second wish…"
He stopped plucking at his facial hair extension and looked intently at Hans…
"My second wish… is to own your house and land… which I will pay a thousand times its value!"
"WHAT?!"
Hans held down his tummy… he started laughing so hard, that his body felt like it was going into a convulsion. Wiping away the tears from his eyes, he settled back in his chair, returning to looking at the visitor, who was obviously still waiting for a response…
"You're not kidding?! Why, of course you can have my land and house! I give it freely to you! Keep your Deutschmarks! Hell… I'll even throw old Wilma the cow into the deal! What am I saying?… You'll need the house to store Brunhilda in! I don't think you, or I, could have removed her from that damned kitchen she's always in!"
Sahara clapped his hands together once more, leaping from his chair in obvious glee…
"Yes! Thank you, my friend! Your decision to grant my wish has once again pleased me deeply!"
Hans, still releasing a giggle at the man's enraptured-state, spoke up…
"Well, don’t stop now! You have one to go! Apparently I had more in my possession than I had considered! I'm waiting! Please! Before my heart fails me with laughter! What is your third and final wish, my friend?!"
Sahara was no longer smiling, nor buoyant… he set his eyes on Hans Bruner, pursing his lips… this man was truly the one who would give him all he had desired for thousands upon thousands of years…
"My last and final request of you, Herr Hans Bruner… the third wish that will seal the deal between us two… is…
…May I have… your LIFE?!"
Hans stared briefly, then peeked over each of his shoulders…
"Just where is the hidden camera?! My life?! Are you kidding me?! You want the life of an old, far-sighted, rheumatism-ridden man with nothing to do but drink a cup of coffee and stare out that window over there?!"
Sahara looked over his shoulder at the portal the man designated as his perch of choice…
"That's exactly what I'm saying! Do we have a deal… my friend?!"
Hans shook his head in disbelief… this was rich with the inane…
"Why, sure you can! Take it all right now! This pathetic life, I give to you, with a clear conscience!"
And so he did… in place of it, Hans was given what he always desired… a small, quiet place… where he could enjoy the virtues of solitude for hour upon hour… away from wife, house chores, and work.
...took over Hans' life in Hapsburg, blissfully… treating the man's ex like she were the queen he never had, growing every type of fruit and vegetable on the farm's fertile land, and sold nearly every item in the shop that had spent decades in dust and tarnish. There was, however, one item that Sahara wouldn't return to its former luster… that would be the lamp that Hans now resided in… the one that had entrapped Sahara for generations of Bruners. If it hadn't been for the plump behind of Hans, rubbing up alongside the lamp, who knew how much longer Sahara would have spent inside the genie bottle.
By asking Hans for three wishes, he had, in fact, given the unsuspecting and ungrateful shop owner what he always wished to be rid of…
copyright 2012
A.
TOMIC |
