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Darkness fills the quiet room
In it I sit
Muscles all
Still
I am alone not
Letting anyone in
Not you
Especially
You.
Staring out the window
Toward pure and endless
Gloom
Remembering my first
Real and true
Love.
Growing
As one
Sharing thoughts
Opinions
Telling anything
Thinking you were listening
To me
Thinking you would catch me
As I would
You.
Little did I know
I was wrong
You were merely
Acting to care
Letting me deal
With double the problems
At hand.
Fairy tales endings are
Happy
Shielding children from
Pain
Things are either black
Or white
Growing up they turn
Gray.
Your white house was always
Spotless
Leaving me to feel its glow
Intensely hot
Fiery
Stable
Free
Things I wished happened
With you
With me.
For the time it took
To get
Here
So fast
You deserted me
Even though we were
Best friends
Without good-bye
You left.
Wanting to follow
In my mind
You were my prince
But you left
And left me
To fight the tears of devotion.
For no reason
Or rhyme things
Change
Growing up
Apart
Would have happened
Whether I liked it
Or not
I was always
Holding on
Not letting truth set in
You didn’t care about
Me
To the depth
I cared
For you.
So soon you
Forgot
Yet I always held tight
Tighter than a little girl
Should
Ever
Have to.
When I close my eyes
Despite everything
I see you
Then to wake
Without you
Is
Terrible.
Lately I’ve been
Miserable
I’ve only you to blame
If running to the moon
Would have brought
You
To me
I’d be there
Then back
Before you would
Realize
That I
Was gone.
No moon
There is
Nothing
You've
Gone
Left me
Here
In a quiet dark space.
Hard to keep my secret
Safe
Not let it show
Yet every time I see
You
It reminds me of when
You were
Mine.
Sitting
Still
Never blinking
To keep the tears from falling
Down my cheek
Your
Not
Worth them.
No Friends to comfort me
I’m falling
Under
And not allowing a
Soul
To
See.
copyright 2004
Catherine
Rajca |
