(And This is that Shifting Impossible Perspective that is the Human Condition) |
lately,
when i close my eyes to sleep,
my dreams
incarnate in variegated stages
of invasion
it's amazing
the multiplicity of ways
the symbols instant replay:
my home overtaken by uninvited men holding out handshakes full of agendas
and screenplays,
or
i'm so close i can see the faces of the snipers on the side of
the freeway,
or
doorless rooms, air heavy with the cool spun glass icicle satin of fog
clogging my lung passages with anthrax
and
does it really matter
that my stature
is completely out of hand
to
mouth existence?
and i am so far out of touch with my internal needs that i can't
even remember the feeling
of hungry?
for anything?
why scrutinize my own life when it's all relative on the spectrum
of perception?
(and this is that shifting impossible perspective that is the human
condition)
i reside (like we all do)
inside my own decided mythology.
i can say i failed completely at said intended eventuality
or
flip the script and simply claim that another path choose me.
both smack of insincerity
leaving me liquefied,
more fluidity than history.
meaning, i can't, with any degree of certainty, even give you
a concrete map of what led me to this stage righthererightnow
terrified, trembling with toomuchtruth, all for you.
memory is as objective as the inconstant moon!
as a gaze at our own reflection or an earful of our own vocal projection
(and this is that shifting impossible perspective that is the human
condition)
we are inverted paradoxes
inside-out stars
with the light shining in
contained in our skin
sweet little packages of magic that can't unwrap themselves.
but i'm trying to -for me and you
trying to remind me and you that we are beautiful
trying to confide in me and you
the realization that we can only be safe
in this temporary, luminous universe of helium balloons and illusion
we are human beings
simply earthlings existing
this mortal's coiled like childish livewire
trying to unravel rapture
delivering little scriptures
full of penniless potential
filling fountains with thousands of wishes
one c/sent to this planet with de facto struggles to overcome
and even with all the differing degrees of lucidity surrounding me
we collectively agree, at the very least, that this is where we are
and this is when we be
and even thinking that that doesn't mean anything means something
and all i want is to give u that single sentence that gets you all sentient
(and this is that shifting)
i wish i could cull it down to one word or better yet a letter
(impossible perspective)
or even moreso just a moan or less an intake of breath like
but you can never truly separate
( that is the human condition)
( even subatomic particles
change their behavior under our observation
and here am i trying to capture life like butterflies )
(and this is that shifting impossible perspective that is the human
condition)
and i love you
copyright 2003
Rachel
Kann |